So, if you've noticed, I didn't finish blogging about my 45 day Gratitude experiment. Yeah.... I'm not so good at keeping up on my blog. What it comes down to is that my life centers around my Family. My little family & my big family. My birth family & my chosen family. I am super duper blessed when it comes to my family. I'm surrounded with love & support at all times, and when I need to reach out for help I've got several people that I can call. This is what I'm most grateful for above all else. So, that's how I'm going to wrap up that project. Don't judge me.
Back to the present....
This morning was day 1 of our challenge.
I snuck in a few breaths while I was giving my son a bubble bath. I sat in the hallway and probably got 5 breaths in before I heard "Mooom?" "Where are you?" Sitting in the hallway... "What are you doing?" Meditating... "Why?"
But, even after a few breaths I felt that warm, calming sensation start down my body. Just a little more present. A little calmer. A little more relaxed. A little bit more like myself.
We finished our bath, got dressed, and I set him up with a cartoon. (Again, don't judge.) I sat and breathed for 10 minutes. I didn't time myself, I just sat until I felt like I was done for now. My attention was everywhere - tasks I'd get to, tasks I'd done, people I want to help, things I want to do, the sound of the fridge running, the washer running, the garbage truck, the WonderPets theme song etc...
Don't judge yourself, Becky. And I don't think I did. From what I've learned the PRACTICE is bringing your thoughts Back. Back to the breath. Back to a mantra. Back to a vision. Always bringing it back. Letting the thoughts come and go without attaching to them.
So, for me, these things are helpful.
1. My Mantra
"I am strong (I am powerful) I am worthy"
These are things I need to tell myself. Things I don't always believe, but things I want to believe about myself. It's really just - Breathe in: I am strong, Breathe out: I am worthy. Somehow, I always think "I am powerful" in there to. So, it is what it is.
2. The Ocean
Some say "let your thoughts pass by like clouds in the sky" But, I'm a water baby. I think I'd be happiest rolling around in the sand on the beach for days. So I bring myself back to my breath, breathing in: the wave approaches the shore. Breathing out: the wave recedes. Repeat.
I love that this is always happening. 24 hours a day. Who knows how many waves reach the shore in a day? It's always there. Constant. Beautiful. I find comfort in that. I can go there - even when I'm not there. It's there.
Does that make sense? Probably not.
But, it makes sense to me.
I hope I keep up on this blog.
More importantly, I'm excited for the challenge of finding time to meditate each day.
After I meditated, I read the email about what our focus is for today.
"I am"
We're focusing on abundance. That there is more than enough for all of us. More than enough time, resources, money, love. It all exists in the universe. The universe will provide for us. We just have to trust it.
Have faith.
Um, Hellz-to-the-Yeah I've got an abundance of Love.
And punkins.
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